Job Layoff: Confronting Why Me?

Perhaps you saw it coming. The fall in company stock prices. The news articles about company troubles. Maybe it was just rumors on the production floor, or a creeping suspicion that orders had slowed down and there was no longer the backlog of work which had been a security blanket. Maybe it was the way management started to avoid you and private meetings were held without any communication issued afterwards.

Finally, it happened. The company, regretfully they assured you, no longer needed your services. The last paycheck was handed over, a checklist of Cobra benefits and unemployment insurance details were reviewed, time to gather your personal items allowed. You walked out in an unreal haze, barely noticing that the remaining staff concentrated on their work as if to avoid the possible contamination of being associated with someone they now saw as a loser. A few of your closer friends shook your hand, with averted eyes, and promised to stay in touch although you both knew that it would never happen.

You drove home, wondering how to tell your family and asking yourself over and over, "Why me?"

Welcome to the gray, anxious, claustrophobic world of unemployment.

Was it fair that you were selected to go?

Of course not.

Is life fair?

Of course not.

The key to maintaining your sense of self-worth through the pressures of unemployment and the rigors of job search, an often demeaning process, is to reframe your outlook and look at yourself both objectively and kindly. You are in an uncomfortable position that was not caused by anything you did, or anything you didn't do. It happened, as bad things often happen to good people.

Treasure yourself, your skills, and your personal value and learn to see what has happened to you as what it can be: an opportunity to take a "time out," to re-assess yourself, practice self-exploration and self-appreciation, and a chance to refocus your life in new and positive directions.

Virginia Bola operated a rehabilitation company for 20 years, developing innovative job search techniques for disabled workers, while serving as a respected Vocational Expert in Administrative, Civil and Workers' Compensation Courts. Author of an interactive and emotionally supportive workbook, The Wolf at the Door: An Unemployment Survival Manual, and a monthly ezine, The Worker's Edge, she can be reached at http://www.virginiabola.com

---

Unemployment Blues: Mind Over Mood

Our lives are tranquil and smooth so seldom, it seems. We have our ups-and-downs, our good days and bad days, our sunny moods and black moods. The... Read More

Three Steps to Writing Your Own Resume

While most professionals hire a professional resume writer, some draft their own resume. People who write a lot for business usually have more success in putting together... Read More

Resumes That Rock (16 Expert Tips)

It's never too early to update your resume, even if you're not searching for a new job. Why? Updating your resume is a valuable reminder to yourself... Read More

Hello Work World, Im Un-Retiring

For many years, you looked forward to that day when you would bid the world of work a fond farewell and ride off into the sunset of... Read More

Seven Steps to Better Networking

If published statistics are accurate, employment agencies and search firms fill about 20% of all jobs in the US. Job boards fill anywhere between 2% and 8%.... Read More

The 5 Ps Of A Job Search

Step One - Plan:Most people spend more time planning a one to two week vacation than they do planning their lifetime career. When planning for a vacation,... Read More

How To Find A Job Writing Grant Applications

Do you have what it takes to land a job doing grant writing? Many people are looking for ways to develop a freelance business, but unless you... Read More

Pair Your Powerful Resume with a Great Cover Letter

Every great resume deserves a great cover letter.A cover letter is crucial because it's the first thing the hiring manager sees. And you only have seconds to... Read More

Switching Careers - 7 Key Steps

Are you thinking about switching careers? If you are, you're not alone. Most Americans switch careers three times in their lifetime. Nevertheless, switching careers is scary. And... Read More

Last Year Physician Resident Checklist

Here is a last year resident checklist not to forget:LICENSING:Licensing is becoming increasingly complex as identity and medical fraud become more common. Therefore don't wait till the... Read More

Turning the Table: Questions for Your Interviewer

(DES MOINES, Iowa ? January 26, 2005) The fateful final question of all interviewers may carry more weight than you would think. Upon hearing "Now, do you... Read More

How to Make Money as a Reflexologist

Being a reflexologist is one of the top five career choices in the field of holistic health. The trend shows that more and more people are turning... Read More

You Should Interview the Interviewer, Too

I know what you are thinking. You're thinking, "Wait a minute. Wouldn't that be somewhat presumptuous if I were to ask the interviewer questions?" No. The truth... Read More

How to Receive Multiple Job Offers After You?re Fired

Ask survivors of the most popular reality television shows and they'll tell you "If you have to eat a cockroach, don't spend too much time thinking about... Read More

Why You Only Really Need Four Sample Resumes

Any job seeker looking for sample resumes usually doesn't have to look very far.A multitude of sites today are offering free sample resumes on the internet in... Read More

A Killer Secret To Get Your Cover Letter Read

You're still reading?so I know my title grabbed your attention.Why? Because it 'packed a punch.' You have three seconds to nab your reader in any written communication.... Read More

Who Should Write Your Resume?

This is a question we get a lot. It seems rather easy to do it yourself if you have access to a word processing program and printer... Read More

Should You Lie On Your Resume?

Warning: Lying on your resume could cost you your job and your freedom.Picture this. You're sitting at your desk working away happily at a company you've been... Read More

Success at Work: Techniques: Computer Literacy

It's hard to believe that there are people in today's workforce who don't know how to use a computer. In today's society, being computer illiterate is equivalent... Read More

How Much Can You Earn Working As A Proofreader?

Thinking of a career as a proofreader? Then you will most likely want to know about salaries. Are you hoping to hear that you will make thousands... Read More

Preparing For Your Job Interview: What You Need To Know To Be Successful

In the limited time an interviewer has with you, their mission is to know you and assess your worth, especially in relationship to the other candidates interviewed.... Read More

5 Interviewing Tips To Get That Job!

Anyone who is a jobseeker knows that looking for a new job or career is a job in itself. Once you have completed the laborious task of... Read More

What Do Accountants And Doctors Have In Common?

Freshly qualified accounting graduates when asked by the interviewer "Are there any questions you want to ask?" usually respond with "What are my duties and responsibilities"Be careful.... Read More

Offer Letter Limbo

Recently we concluded the placement of a Senior Sales Representative for a publicly traded company. The role was ripe with potential as the company products were being... Read More

Is a Career Change on Your Horizon?

Making a career change is nothing new in today's job market.I've heard it said that the average American changes careers at least once in his or her... Read More

How To Write The Perfect Cover Letter: Be Brief--And Be Gone!

The best cover letters are 'one-page wonders.' Why? Because they suit today's busy employers who are already overloaded and often overwhelmed. The best way to catch their... Read More