Everyone Has Been Hurt..... Part 5

Continued...

About a year later I met my husband. I met him through his youngest sister and we were inseparable. We began to fight a lot after his ex started coming in to the picture and I could not handle it. She was a pain in my ass. She was always at his house for special occasions and for holidays, always in my life, always in his and nobody seemed to get it. I got pregnant again and made it to 4 and half mths and its heart stopped and I had to have surgery again. I went through that by myself. He wasn't there and I resented that but I still wanted to be with him.

A few years later pregnant again. It was in the tubes ,had to have the tube and baby removed, lost that one. He was very upset about that one. The doctor said stop, quit trying. I went home and prayed. We got married in between those times. I prayed and I prayed, "God, just give me a son and I will never ask for another child again". About 6 mths later my wish and prayer was answered. I knew I was pregnant before I even had the test, and I knew it would be a boy and everything would be ok. I also knew he would be born at Christmas time.

God blessed me with a son, I believe I had him at Christmas to heal my heart and to allow me to enjoy the holidays again. I am eternally grateful and I kept my promise. Back to my husband. I always felt like I wasn't good enough for him, like I was second to him, that he really wanted the ex and since he couldn't have her I would do. I felt like I pressured him to get married because I said if you don't I will leave you. We had been together for 4 yrs and I had wasted enough time. It was time to move forward. After all that we ended up having all that trouble and I feel like I stayed for along time because of Dakota. I wanted him to be happy and have a family, to not have the life I led.

I love Dakota with all of my heart. I want him to be happy. My biggest fear was not being the mom he needed me to be. The best I could do may not be good enough. I always felt if I do nothing else right this will be the one I get right. But I doubted myself constantly. I didn't know what the right decisions were at the time. We ended up getting a divorce.

Vaughn Pascal

---

The Finer, and Finest, Things in Life

In America, we have a saying: The finer things in life. These are the things that most people talk about when they are speaking of thing of... Read More

A Plausible Defense

Direct Answers - Column for the week of August 5, 2002I just looked at your website and read "Wanting To Be Caught," and I truly think that... Read More

Wherever You Are, Be There

One of the major reasons why we fail to find happiness or to create unique lifestyle is because we have not yet mastered the art of being.While... Read More

Say Thank You to the Cow for the Steak on Your Plate

Have you ever said thank-you to the cow that provided you with the steak for your dinner!I expect you think the idea preposterous. If you were to... Read More

Passion: What It Means To Live With It

Passion can guide you, not just to live, but to live with purpose. Throughout my professional career, I've had most fortunate opportunities to associate with numerous high... Read More

Life is a Mystery...or is it?

Being the last of three daughters, I was a suprise to my parents who were being very cautious about not having any more children. At the age... Read More

How Do You Read the Bible?

Here's a simple parable with an important moral.Each mirror, you see, has inspectors, who, acting as corporate protectors, must find any scratch, every unseemly patch. They're inferior... Read More

Naomi and the 5 Life Lessons

Not long ago, I attended a seminar that featured Naomi Judd, half of the legendary country music duo, The Judds. Naomi, with her talented daughter, Wynonna, set... Read More

Changing the World... One Book at a Time

Ever read a book that's changed your life? Most of the today's most beloved authors and spiritual teachers can recall a book that started them on the... Read More

The Best Gift to Give Yourself and Others

I'm often asked the question, "How can I best help my children, spouse, family member, staff member, friend etc. improve/change?" In fact that might be the most... Read More

Ask the Angels - Get Specific !

There are Angels for everything and they are just waiting for us to ask for their help. They can't help if we don't ask.Our request doesn't have... Read More

FEAR Don?t Let it Control You!

Fear. What is it? Can you touch it? Can you hold it? Can you show it to another person? I can almost hear you from where I... Read More

On Track

Direct Answers - Column for the week of January 27, 2003I have been involved with a married man for a little while. I am married myself, but... Read More

Who is the Pilot?

It was a mild summer day in Raleigh-Durham, North Carolina when I boarded United Airline flight 7318 to Washington, DC. Like usual, I promptly located my window... Read More

The Angels on My Path

I'm leaving on a TV tour in a few weeks. I'm going to be on the road. This is my second one and I'll visit TV news... Read More

Delay Can Reveal Doubts

Confident Expectation! The feeling of 'confidence' is the assurance that your desire IS on its way. And getting to that place where we have no doubt is... Read More

Small Steps, Great Strides

Sacred space, sacred timeBelieve in your personal power, retrieve if lostExplore, enhance creativity to allow flow of positive energyDon't get stuck in a rut, seek out a... Read More

Wanna Trade Places?

Even immediately after my car accident, every single person who saw me was pleasantly shocked at how "great" I looked. Funny how much a little concealer and... Read More

Inspired Intuition - Following Your Inner Voice

"Some people call the still, small voice insight or intuition?Our insight is a gift from God, not to be taken lightly or for granted... If we acknowledge... Read More

Such Love Transforms

Everything was arranged: once the funeral was over, all were to go to Hephzibah's house for the after-funeral dinner. It was the way things were done in... Read More

How to Overcome Loneliness

Nowadays the majority of people live in very large cities. It is hard to imagine that in cities of millions of people that anyone could feel lonely.... Read More

Anamchara - Living An Essential Life

What is essential in your life? This question contains one of the most important words an question can address. This is the word "essence." To know your... Read More

Garbage In Its Place

There is nothing worse than seeing garbage blowing down the street of your neighborhood, or finding broken shards of glass at the local swimming hole where children... Read More

Energy Work Basics Part 4: Imagine!

Einstein said, "Imagination is more important than knowledge".Did you know that athletes use the power of their imaginations to perfect their athletic performances? Musicians and vocalists do... Read More

Taking Life Head On

"We are built to conquer environment, solve problems, achieve goals and we find no real satisfaction or happiness in life without obstacles to conquer and goals to... Read More

Rightful Owner

Direct Answers - Column for the week of January 20, 2003I was recently looking through some old photos when I found some of an ex-boyfriend when he... Read More