How to Have a Sizzler of a Honeymoon! Article No. 3

Home
>
Marriage & Wedding
>
How to Have a Sizzler of a Honeymoon! Article No. 3

How to Have a Sizzler of a Honeymoon! Article No. 3

Remember the frenzy of the paparazzi when they caught Sarah Ferguson, the Duchess of York, having her toe sucked at a beach? What was the big deal? Was it that she was so well-known? Or was it that this piece of fore play was being conducted in a more or less public place? Or was it the toe itself that did it?

When it comes to love-making, we thought we'd seen it all.

We know people do it in showers and baths, on board tables or under them, horizontally or slightly perpendicular, and vertically flat against a brick wall or against something anchored to the ground. But in all this, the toe just didn't figure.

Sure, we do seem to remember that guy who toasted a beauty of his time by drinking out of her slipper. But we didn't really believe that it happened. Or if it did, we could only assume that the gallant had already had a few drinks before he came up with the idea.

But as queasy as we get thinking about using a slipper as a glass, the imagination boggles at the thought of a toe as a snack. After all, when we look at our shoes in the dark recesses of our wardrobe we know where those toes have been, and are not entirely reassured that they're worth any attention at all, let alone the intimacy of a suck or two.

Yes, we have heard that toes, like other body appendages, are sensitive and can be as arousing as the more recognized erogenous zones. But we also know our feet. So long as we remember that the soles are like sandpaper, the nails as hard as a rhinoceros horn, and about as sweet smelling as a three or four day old fish, love-making and toes will never be an equation in our books.

We'll nibble the ears, kiss the fingers, make a few detours down the length of the body, stopping well beyond the danger zone of the toes.

It has been said that the man who first ate an oyster must have been the bravest man on earth. The same must be said of the man or woman who first decided to try out the toes.

So if you consider yourself a hot lover, and have never tried out your partner's toes, you've still a long way to go.

Vlady Peters, who is a Civil Marriage Celebrant, is an author of three books, "The Complete Book of Australian Weddings", "The small Organisation Handbook", and an ebook, "Honeymoon! A Sizzle or a Fizzle?' which you can see on her website http://www.vlady-celebrant.com

In The News:

St. Louis Post-Dispatch
Eloping to Vegas? Why Not Lower Manhattan?
New York Times, United States - Jan 7, 2009
“With these new digs, there might just be a new world wedding capital.” The city clerk’s office issued 66600 marriage licenses 2007 and performed about ...
Manhattan's new Marriage Bureau earns wows as a place to say your vows New York Daily News
NY hears wedding bells, aims to compete with Vegas The Associated Press
Wedding Bells Ring In NYC Marriage Bureau WNYC
Downtown Express - Gothamistall 254 news articles

Boston Globe
‘Bride Wars’ is a failed marriage | 1 ½ stars
Kansas City Star, MO - 12 hours ago
And their mutual friends will have to decide which wedding to attend. All would be well if only one of them would cancel (or if they would agree to a double ...
Video: Ann Hathaway's Stellar Year CBS
'Bride Wars' stars Kate Hudson and Anne Hathaway are funny allies Los Angeles Times
Two Weddings and a Furor New York Times
Tampa Tribune - Boston Globeall 757 news articles

New York Times
Movie review: Cliches nag 'Not Easily Broken'
San Francisco Chronicle, USA - 5 hours ago
The opening wedding scene in the new Bill Duke film, "Not Easily Broken" is so overwrought and cliched, it's akin to sitting down with a promising novel, ...
Not Easily Broken ( ** ) AHN
Movie Review: ‘Not Easily Broken’ is a romantic soap opera that ... Providence Journal
» Inspirational drama anything but 'Broken' Chicago Daily Herald
Pittsburgh Post Gazette - Kansas City Starall 77 news articles

FOR FAMILIES: A guide for parents to Jan. 9 and earlier releases
Chicago Tribune, United States - 10 hours ago
By Roger Moore | Tribune Newspapers What it's about: Best friends become dueling brides when they both book the wedding they've always dreamed of in the ...

Wedding war: Las Vegas versus New York
KVBC, NV - 8 hours ago
The city has renovated it marriage bureau and even built a 24000-square-foot wedding complex with the hope of becoming the most popular wedding site. ...

Wearing white and eating cake, Brides magazine turns 75
The Canadian Press, NEW YORK - 20 hours ago
"The magazine is realistic about how people's lives are today, but still the focus is how to have a successful wedding and start a healthy marriage," says ...

New York Magazine
City to Make Your Shotgun Marriage Just That Much Nicer
New York Magazine, USA - Jan 7, 2009
Photo: Getty Images Perhaps sensing the economic downturn (and having eventually watched the Sex and the City movie), the city spruced up its civil-wedding ...

MLive.com
Bay County gets older, refrains from marriage, likes guns ...
MLive.com, MI - 18 hours ago
Luczak said economics could be partly to blame, as young couples struggling to get a foothold in life may be putting off the expense of a wedding.

MSNBC
Couple goes from divorce to 'I Do Again'
MSNBC - 12 hours ago
Cheryl and Jeff Scruggs, founders of Hope Marriage Ministries, recount the slow destruction of their relationship, which ended in divorce. ...

Former First Lady Cornelia Wallace Dies At 69
NBC13.com, AL - 4 hours ago
Just 16 months after their wedding Governor Wallace was shot. The assassination attempt left Wallace paralyzed. Fifty-four days later, he left the hospital ...

marriage wedding - Google News

Your Ad Here

How to Have a Sizzler of a Honeymoon! Article No. 3

Marriage & Wedding Marriage & Wedding