Not speaking your language?

Why We Choose Our Parents

There is a concept in Jewish mystical thought known as gilgul, which can be translated as reincarnation. Gilgul does not necessarily mean that a soul in its entirety has been reincarnated; it may only be a nitzotz, or spark of a soul, that is reincarnated. That is to say that an individual can possess a nitzotz from the soul of someone who has lived previously. Gilgul occurs when the preceding incarnation of that soul has more to accomplish.

Rabbi Menashe Ben Israel of the 17th century writes that the word, gilgul, in Hebrew letters equals the numerical value of 72, which is also chesed, the Hebrew word for kindness. When this type of numerical connection occurs,it implies a conceptual relationship. In this case, reincarnation is seen as the ultimate kindness, in that a soul is given another chance for the refinement of its past and the spiritual advancement of its future.

Ultimately, a soul can never fail. To succeed, the soul will come back as many times as necessary to fulfill its spiritual mission. This is the view of the Kabbalists, who call the process of the soul's returning for the purpose of rectification tikkun, or repair. Sometimes it is discussed as the birur hisaron, or the clearing of a shortcoming.

If greatness is your soul's destiny, then to achieve it, it's only logical that you have a plan. Just as you would not head off to college without knowing about the school you'll be attending, souls do not randomly incarnate into this world. Rather, souls arrive with a very specific curriculum containing both goals and challenges. Your parents are a big part of that program.

It is in this respect that the Hasidic master Rabbi Yisrael of Rhizin teaches that our souls choose our parents. While the reasons for a soul's choice of parents will vary, it is always significant. Reasons can include past life relationships, or simply the conducive environment that the parents can provide for the soul in achieving its overall goal.

In a broad sense, your parents are the guarantors of your mission. How this works is different in every case. One possibility is that your parents will provide positive mentoring, as guides and as a support system. Another is the opposite - that they will model for you what you do not want to become and thus clarify the positive direction in which you need to go. For many it is a combination of the two. The key is to know that directly or indirectly, your parents create the fire behind your passion to grow toward your spiritual advancement.

Here is an exercise to help you find out what your purpose is in this world and what role your parents are playing in it. Ask yourself these three questions:

1. Regardless of what I do for a living and what my obligations are, what is the theme that most obviously is pushing my soul forward in life, day after day?

2. What is the one theme that best describes the force pulling my soul off track day after day?

3. What role have my parents played, directly or indirectly, in developing these themes?

Why bother looking at these themes at all? Because through them we can discover the real reason we chose to come here this time around, and as an added bonus, we may discover why we chose our parents to raise us. Ultimately, the biblical commandment does not obligate us to love our parents, but to honor them. Honor in Hebrew is kibbud, which literally means "to make heavy". To honor our parents means to acknowledge them as people of tremendous worth in our pilgrimage of life. It demands effort and often requires a tolerance for emotional pain, yet it is the most dignified endeavor of an entire lifetime.

Copyright 2000 by Michael Ezra Ozair, Los Angeles, CA. Prepared in collaboration with OLAM Magazine. Please distribute freely for non-commercial purposes.

Rabbi Michael Ozair has been providing spiritual guidance for the last 15 years to a very wide and diverse range of people. He is an ordained rabbi, a well sought after scholar in the area of Kabbalah, published author, life coach and spiritual counselor. Michael's expertise stems from merging his knowledge as a teacher of metaphysics with his experience in practical counseling. He can be reached at coach@kabbalahcoach.com or by visiting his site at http://www.KabbalahCoach.com

Higgins & Burke Six Flavor Tea Bag Assortment, Variety Tea, 120/Carton

Higgins & Burke Six Flavor Tea Bag Assortment, Variety Tea, 120/Carton

From You Flowers. LLC


What Is Wrong With Being Common?

The Emmaus Journal What is Wrong With Being Common? This questioning title has tenaciously lingered in my mind for the past few months. Precociously tethered... Read More

Mystic Vision Opens Mind Body Connection

Worldwide extensive research is being published related to the mind-body connection, and many investigators have come to the conclusion that the mind is simply not... Read More

Genetically Predisposed to Faith

Have you ever wondered how much faith you really have? If you are like me there have been times in your life when you question... Read More


There is an inherent generosity in the human spirit to be of help, to be of service to others. What is it that makes us... Read More

Linear Unidirectional Time Is An Illusion!

In a recent article entitled "Our Virtual Reality Reality" I discussed how with a powerful new healing modality called the Mind Resonance Process(TM)(MRP) many individuals... Read More

Honoring the Sacred in Everyday Life

How many of us rush blindly through our days, fall into bed exhausted, and wake up the next morning to do it all over again?... Read More

Prophetic Ministry: How to See in the Spirit and Begin Prophetic Words

A Nathan type prophet sees with his eyes. A Samuel type prophet sees with all 5 senses.In the natural realm, I am reminded of Albert... Read More